Burning the candle

My mum's favourite saying for me is to tell me I'm 'burning the candle at both ends'. If this saying isn't one that's used frequently in places other than my mum's kitchen, it just means I tend to do a lot. I don't know when it started but I've always been involved in...stuff.

In primary school I had swimming lessons, played netball, indoor cricket, athletics and calisthenics. I also sang in a choir which meant weekly practises and weekend performances, I even went in a few shows. When I wasn't out at one of these various organised activities, I was doing things at home. I remember starting a pot pourri business with a girl down the road once. (We basically molested all the rose bushes in the street and then used Mum's perfume to scent them)I got hooked on macrame at one odd stage too.

Through high school, which I walked to and from every day, I alwasy had an extra bag with me. That was for the lunch time aerobics, or dance class, gym, or the netball/basketball/voleyball team trials that day. I joined the debating team, tried my hand at a Shakespeare play, was in several musicals, was on the swimming team for some reason (I'm really bad at it), tried diving, did more choir stuff and even had a stint of the language committee. (It was mainly for the foreign food)

After school finished I remembered being a bit disappointed that all the 'new' things in my life would stop. But they haven't. I've learnt to row in a coxed 8, I took up running, my netball is threatening to take over my life, there was an attempt at basketball (kept getting fouled off) and of course I'm back into singing, but just me this time.

I'm sitting at work typing this at the moment and some of my co-workers had a chat about what they were doing tonight, that's what got me started on this. I giggled to myself and sighed a little when they were both headed home for a night in. My back/quads/calves are stiff and sore form training Tuesday. I'm about to head into the toilets here to do my superman style chnage before heading to coach another session for an hour and a half. I'll be practising my singing on the way home and thinking of what to get my girlfriend who is bound for London.

It sounds exhausting writing it all down, and it is. But I don't think I'd have it any other way. People always say that I must be so motivated but I'm not. If anything I'm the complete opposite. I just know that if I have nothing to do, I would quite literally do nothing. I need to involve myself in these things to save my arse (Or what's left of it) from being swallowed by the couch. Having said all that I gotta go, training awaits!

Valentine's Victory

This time last year, I was apparently a little annoyed. I felt at the time my annoyance was justified, and I while I may now think that my little hissy fit wasn't my finest moment, I still uphold my beliefs on the minor issue of Valentine's Day.

This year, I was going to do something cool. I hadn't nutted it out completely but I was thinking a fun day out or dinner somewhere we'd never been before. Just something that we don't normally do. After all, we don't do anniversaries or anything so if I wanted a 'special' night out, I just had to do it myself. My plans came to nothing in the end as our beautiful country suffered our worst natural disaster in history. Somehow celebrating with frivolous gifts seemed inappropriate and heartless in the face of such tragedy.

So I settled on some gorgeous but simple paper and I spent a few hours one morning during our moving trying to put into words everything that he is to me. All in all, I spent $1.

I gave him the card when we woke up Saturday morning, then made him breakfast. He was moved and touched by the card and loved everything I'd written. I was happy with this. I know him now perhaps better than I ever have before, so I knew not to expect anything and I was completely fine with it. He strolled down the shops to get the papers to read while we enjoyed brekkie...and returned with a bunch of bright yellow tulips. They are absolutely beautiful and look stunning in our new house that we've made together.

So I guess I got my way this year, even though it doesn't really feel like it.
It feels better.
Like we've deepened our understanding of what the other person needs and wants and that's why these little things are happening. It's brilliant. And it all comes back to the wise words of a friend of mine: You have to teach your partner how to read you. You can't just expect them to read your mind. It's all about explaining why you reacted in a certain way, and what you need from them when that happens. It sounds stupidly obvious but it's definitely worth a try.


Here's hoping you all had something to smile about on Saturday.

I think I just found a grey hair.

So apparently moving is right up there on the list of incredibly stressful things you'll ever do in your lifetime. It comes in just after death, divorce and illness...

That certainly explains a lot after the week I've had. I have spontaneously broken into tears about 3 times. I have 2 arguments with someone I never argue with. And the rest of the time I float between being anxious, unsure or just plain flat.
It's only looking back on the week now that I realise what an emotional fruit loop I've been. To be honest I don't even know why I've been stressed. It's just picking crap up and putting it down somewhere else...so what's the big deal????

If anyone can let me in on this secret it would be greatly appreciated. in the mean time, I'm off work all next week to do the move and we'll be offline for a while. I'll let you know how it all goes when I get back, as long as I retain all my mental faculties of course.

So...when's it your turn?

That question has haunted me now for the last three and a half years. It seems like you're never allowed to be in the moment in relationships, you always need to be headed somewhere. If there's no destination, then gosh, what are you two doing????

When we decided to go overseas after about a year and a half together, his work mates had a book running at work with bets on where we'd get engaged. When I sent back photos of us with the pyramids, one of the girls at my work zoomed right in and pronounced us engaged when she spotted a ring on my left hand. (It was my boring everyday ring there so appease the culture and ward off unwanted attention.)
When I rang my brother one random night, he was all excited and asked if I had anything to tell him?

With the recent happy unions of so many of our friends, friends who have officially been together less time than us, we seem to be the target for this question more and more. It's kinda of nice in a way, I guess it means that people think we're good together and want to make it official so nothing untoward can happen. Although to be honest, I hardly think a ring and piece of paper will guarantee anything in this day and age.

Truthfully, I'd love to get married. I would. Not because of the day itself, but because I've found someone who makes me happy. All the time. Even when I'm trying to be annoyed. The day would certainly be fun but I'm refusing to be a girl who is dominated by the day of the white dress. I don't want to sound judgemental though, i totally get it if people want to go crazy with the wedding day, it's just not something I feel I want to do. And now that everyone is asking constantly and waiting impatiently for it, I'm happy to wait a little longer and shock the pants off some people if that day ever comes.

So, if you have a friend in a long term relationship; they're happy and in love, please stop yourself from asking the question. I beg you on behalf of someone on the other side, it is best to just let it happen and enjoy the surprising phone call when you get it!