When we decided to go overseas after about a year and a half together, his work mates had a book running at work with bets on where we'd get engaged. When I sent back photos of us with the pyramids, one of the girls at my work zoomed right in and pronounced us engaged when she spotted a ring on my left hand. (It was my boring everyday ring there so appease the culture and ward off unwanted attention.)
When I rang my brother one random night, he was all excited and asked if I had anything to tell him?
With the recent happy unions of so many of our friends, friends who have officially been together less time than us, we seem to be the target for this question more and more. It's kinda of nice in a way, I guess it means that people think we're good together and want to make it official so nothing untoward can happen. Although to be honest, I hardly think a ring and piece of paper will guarantee anything in this day and age.
Truthfully, I'd love to get married. I would. Not because of the day itself, but because I've found someone who makes me happy. All the time. Even when I'm trying to be annoyed. The day would certainly be fun but I'm refusing to be a girl who is dominated by the day of the white dress. I don't want to sound judgemental though, i totally get it if people want to go crazy with the wedding day, it's just not something I feel I want to do. And now that everyone is asking constantly and waiting impatiently for it, I'm happy to wait a little longer and shock the pants off some people if that day ever comes.
So, if you have a friend in a long term relationship; they're happy and in love, please stop yourself from asking the question. I beg you on behalf of someone on the other side, it is best to just let it happen and enjoy the surprising phone call when you get it!
2 comments:
Amen to that! All the questions just ruin it, then you start to wonder why he's asking you, is it just to shut them all up or because he feels he should? I want it to be a giant surprise, if it ever happens.
I totally get this!! I'm married now, but when my husband and I were just dating (and keep in mind we only dated 1.5 years before we got engaged), people would ask all the time. I was all, "Uhhh...I don't know; can't I enjoy it as it comes? SHEESH!" Now that I'm married, I get the "when are you having a baby?" questions. Finally, I have a gameplan for that, but it doesn't mean I TELL everyone about it - just everyone on the Internet. ;o) I think it's great you are in a happy, committed relationship where you don't feel the pressure to fulfill social norms. As for the big wedding DAY push, I was sooooo not the "normal" girl in that regard. It stressed me out to no end, and when I look back and think about all it entailed, I just thank God I'm married and NEVER have to do that again! Ha!
Your time will come when it's meant to come. So refreshing to know there is another happy-in-love girl out there who ISN'T enforcing ultimatums and freaking out because she doesn't have a ring on her finger. I have no doubt you're better for it!
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